Allison Davies
The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.
Deanna
There are moments in this movie where the great movie it could've been peek out... They're fleeting, here, but they're worth savoring, and they happen often enough to make it worth your while.
Kinley
This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows
TheLittleSongbird
There is a good indication of whether a movie is bad if it's featured on MST3K and if it's on the bottom 100. Both of those cases apply to Night Train to Mundo Fine, a movie that has a reputation for being one of the worst movies ever made and is one that lives up to that reputation. It is a memorable movie, but as said in the review summary unfortunately it isn't for the right reasons. What is further unfortunate is that Night Train to Mundo Fine is also one of those movies where it is next to impossible to be entertained by it, because you spend the whole duration infuriated by how incompetently done it is. If there was anything that was remotely decent, no matter how small, it was the theme song which is actually pretty good. The editing and camera work however look like a real amateur's job, it's poorly lit, shot in a jumbled way and edited in a way that suggests the editor being drunk. The story is even worse, when it wasn't being so jumbled in structure and so tedious in pacing- though not quite as badly as Manos, Monster A-Go Go and The Creeping Terror- there was hardly even one. The dialogue is sheer laziness and reeks of cheese and you are never emotionally invested in the characters(as a matter of fact the only emotion for them that you feel is annoyance). To say that the direction is flat is being too kind, and the acting is some of the worst acting you'll ever witness, most look as though they're not even trying to act. All in all, so poorly done in every area apart from the theme song, no entertainment to be had in it whatsoever. 1/10 Bethany Cox
Ben Holland
So there are good bad movies (plan 9, attack of the giant X monster movies) and then there are bad bad movies, like this one and Manos. The bots do some justice to these movies but what makes them just terrible is that absolutely nothing happens. Yes, the editing is beyond the pale, music sounds like it came out of a greeting card, the script is non- existent, and the acting is terrible and dull. We all know this, otherwise it won't be on MST3K. What makes this movie truly stand out is, like Manos, nothing happens for about an hour. You see cars moving, something about a truck being sold, pawning a gold ring, murdering some random person with a blind daughter, a "for rent" sign, and these are the memorable parts of the movie. The unmemorable parts involve wonderful song scenes of driving, flying, driving, climbing up somewhere not Cuba, flying, driving, sleeping, smoking, and more driving. Who could possibly forget the memorable and thrilling scene of buying some sandwich makings before getting into a car? If this reminds you of 10 minutes of random fields as credits roll by, it should.
Sandcooler
"Red Zone Cuba" is a movie that peaks early, with a brief cameo by the always fantastic John Carradine. Once the king of B-movie legends is done reading cue cards while looking 200 years old, it just turns into the usual Coleman Francis dreck. No plot whatsoever: check. Shot on film that looks like it wants to kill itself: check. A cast consisting of the ugliest people on the planet: check. But unlike "Beast Of Yucca Flats" or "The Skydivers", "Red Zone Cuba" does become so bad it's good here and there. Don't get me wrong, it's a boring movie, but occasionally it gets so bizarre you just have to laugh. The part where they try to take over Cuba is hilarious, the army consists of ten people tops. I also love the part with the woman "who's been blind since her husband was killed in the war". If anyone can figure out how that would work, I'll be glad to hear it. The best part however is that Coleman Francis, apparently blinded by his massive success (or possibly since his husband was killed in the war), gave himself the lead this time! Glorious bad acting ensues. If you're ever in a situation where you're forced to watch one Coleman Francis movie (it could happen), better make it this one.
bensonmum2
Do you know what's worse than a movie directed by Coleman Francis? A movie directed by and starring Coleman Francis. I simply cannot imagine anyone watching this thing without the Mystery Science Theater 3000 commentary. I'm a fan of "bad" movies, but Red Zone Cuba would be too much on its own. A nonsensical plot involving a Cuban invasion, the worst acting imaginable, and editing that looks as if it were done by monkeys are just a few of the "highlights". I defy anyone to find a frame of this movie that in some way isn't flawed. Every moment presents a new and even more amazing decent into putrid film-making. I cannot see giving this abomination anything higher than a 1/10.But, with the MST3K commentary, Red Zone Cuba becomes absolutely hysterical. I laughed so hard during the film's second half that I had tears in my eyes. I'll put this episode near the top of my list of favorites. Episode #619 gets a 5/5 on my MST3K rating scale.
