Tommy Nelson
This movie feels like it's about 2 and a half hours. In actuality it runs at just over 80 minutes, but the bad jokes and terrible acting make it seem twice as long. Jason Mewes has always been fine acting in other movies, but here his acting is really dull. The worst actor is Paris Hilton, who plays a rich heiress, known by the public because of her father's fame...sound familiar?The direction is usually okay, but it can get annoying. One instance Paris Hilton kicks Jason Mewes in what looks like the most staged act ever. One scene the camera swirls around 180 degrees, but it seems they couldn't get a full 360 degree turn, so it keeps doing the same 180 degree turn during the same conversation and it's practically nauseating. For the main titles, I'll blame Howie Nourmand, the title supervisor. The opening scene was a poor flash animation, as were several scenes throughout, and it cheapened the movie.Owen (Jason Mewes) hasn't been taking care of his father's bar, and it's going to close down if he doesn't get money to pay the debts off. Owen goes to California to win a bar tending contest, and while there he lives with his closeted homosexual Uncle Earl (David Keith). Uncle Earl works as a camera man for an entertainment program, and while on set, Lisa Mancini (Paris Hilton), a well known wealthy girl, almost hits Owen with her car and ends up ruining a movie set. Because this would be bad publicity for the studio, she doesn't agree to pay Owen or acknowledge what happened. This angers him, so he blackmails her, but instead of the money, he wants her to make him popular. They end up falling in love, but she's dating TV star Hayden Field(Brian Hallisey). Chaos ensues.Spoilers are featured in the next two paragraphs, so don't read on if you want to be surprised by the predictable ending. The characters here are very strange. Owen is extremely unlikeable and I would have liked to see him get nothing, go back home poor and live in a cardboard box, but instead he gets the girl, and gets the money for his dad's bar. Hayden Field is actually a nice character, and wants to help people out. Hayden ends up losing his career, because Owen is a jerk and releases a porno video that Hayden made. Hayden ends up working in a fast food joint, which makes no sense. I didn't realize that right after you lose your acting job you become poor and need work. Looks like the writers didn't think of that...anyways, Hayden ends up with no girlfriend or money, but he still is friends with the jerk who did this to him, and he even suggests for Owen to pursue Lisa. What kind of sense does that make? The writing is based entirely on backwards morals that don't add up.The whole video tape part of the film made no sense. Every part of the film relating to the video tapes were stupid, and full of plot holes, inconsistencies and were really just a cheap way to end the movie. First thing, is why in the world would a big time movie star have a VHS camcorder? If he's so rich, he'd at least have a camera from within the last 5 years, and Hayden said himself that every company gives him everything for free. Apparently cameras weren't one of them. Next, why would the video of Hayden ruin his career, but the even more explicit video from Uncle Earl boost his career higher than it ever was? Also, how in the world would television host Pip Wingo (Phil Morris), who didn't even see what happened to the tapes, figure out exactly how Uncle Earl switched them. Is he psychic? Finally, why does no one actually think to watch the tapes before paying huge sums of money to get them? Are people, other than the very untalented writers of this flick that stupid?Onto the acting. It's about what you'd expect in comparison to everything else about the film, really bad. Jason Mewes and Paris Hilton give similar performances, like both of them were drunk or high while filming, which they very well could have been. David Keith deserves to be a supporting character on a TV sitcom, because this guy is pretty charismatic. His character is annoying, and nothing is funny about his character, but he's trying his hardest, and with a TV show, he wouldn't be half bad.The musical score isn't bad. It's fairly lively and fun. It was almost like a worse version of Danny Elfman's theme to Pee Wee's Big Adventure, but it really wasn't bad. It's one part of the movie that's alright.I don't get why the title of this movie is Bottoms Up. Jason Mewes plays a bartender, but that has nothing to do with the plot, and is rarely seen. It's probably named this to appeal to drunk teens who find relateable titles hilarious. It might as well be called "Take a Hit" or "Knocking Back a Few". They're just as logical titles as "Bottoms Up". It's not about drinking, it's about a poorly acted romance.My final complaint is about the cover. Why does Paris Hilton have blonde hair on the cover but brown hair in the movie? Why is she first credited over Jason Mewes? She really isn't in that much of the movie despite being the main romantic interest. Also, I think Jason Mewes has a more solid fan base than Paris Hilton. It's really easy to nitpick this movie, because of everything about it. Clichés around every corner followed by nonstop gay/fart jokes. Maybe that's funny to some people...no, I can't imagine this being funny to anyone.My rating: BOMB/****. 85 mins. R for language, sexual/crude humor and drug use.
lastliberal
I am going for a record folks. This is my third Paris Hilton Movie (1 Night in Paris, House of Wax). Is that a sign of suicidal tendency or have I lost it completely? I report; you decide.Jason Mewes is Goober, a bartender (slack job in this case) with slacker buddies (one is Kevin Smith), who goes to Hollywood to get money to save pops restaurant. he stays with his gay uncle (David Keith), who is pretending to be straight. This is the only character in the movie worth watching as he is hilarious pretending to be straight when he is the very definition of flaming queen.Goober wants to be cool, so he wrangles his way into Lisa Mancini's (Paris Hilton) current boyfriend's (Brian Hallisay) entourage. This is the biggest collection of idiots I have ever seen. As Uncle Earl says, where is Charles Manson when you need him. But there was some real juicy tatas at the parties! Paris Hilton as Lisa actually comes off as a really nice girl deep down (BWAAAAA HAAAA HAAA)) and ole Goober falls in love until she sticks it to him again. And, no, he doesn't get to stick it to her first.Oh, heck, there were some funny parts, so I will bump up the score. Tatas: 2, funny parts (including Uncle Earl): 2 for a total of 4.
vagrantfilms
OK, So here is the deal this is certainly not Preston Sturges, but there truly are worse films out there than this. I mean I can't really live in a world where The Passion of the Christ is not on a list of worst films, or where Larry The Cable Guy goes middle of the pack on this list, which reminds me, I'm hoping enough people see The Hamster Cage, because its incredibly bad, let try and get that film on here for the ages.Here's hoping films other than a low brow , indie comedy can while being bad can give way to true stinkers. An yes The Hamster Cage was also a low budget indie, but compared to Bottoms Up , The Hamster Cage is auspisciously bad, and takes itself a lot more seriously.
Seth Nelson
"Bottom's Up" is just like that "Anus Magillicutty" film us Bottom 100 junkies were force-fed earlier in the year. Why? I mean, first of all, both movies just showed up at #1 unexpectedly. And two, these movies are perfect for the careless!!!!!So, because of this, let me say this: this movie is terrific!!!!! It's amazing; a true masterpiece. I mean, the movie is totally random and completely nonsensical!!!!! It has all the comedy, all the fun, everything!!!!!I recommend this movie to anyone on my list. That is, the movie lovers' list!!!!! And for that, I give this a ten, too. Let's go. I had enough Bottom 100 movies of 2006 to review!!!!!10 stars
