Mjeteconer Just perfect...

CrawlerChunky In truth, there is barely enough story here to make a film.

Bergorks If you like to be scared, if you like to laugh, and if you like to learn a thing or two at the movies, this absolutely cannot be missed.

Caryl It is a whirlwind of delight --- attractive actors, stunning couture, spectacular sets and outrageous parties. It's a feast for the eyes. But what really makes this dramedy work is the acting.

insanebasura The distinguishing, memorable feature of the cover of Zero Dark Thirty is the big bold capitalized font with one word per line.What they've done here, is exactly that, but replaced "THIRTY" with "DIRTY" So at a glance at this movie's cover, one might be led to believe that this is actually the movie which presentation they're approximating. This is of course the intent.The thing was the equivalent of $0.50, so I'm not mad at having lost money. Actually reckon I got my money's worth just from the perplexing amusement when properly looking at the cover. "Frank Stallone, Daniel Baldwin...wait what? Corey Feldman? What the f***?"But, that is amusement unintended by this production, and the people who handled the marketing of this movie in my region are a bunch of assholes. F*** those people. One star.

mojopro Belvis Bash, a sort of failed Johnny Cash/Elvis type as the name implies has an opportunity to make a difference. To go on a trip to... Afghanistan. If he could just figure out what fourteen hundred hours meant, everything would be looking good. The film really takes a turn when he arrives, and we see worlds clash. It is here that Lex Lovovsky as Bash first shows us that we will sympathize with him as much as we will laugh. He plays the genuine innocence that makes a fish out of water story like this work. The film is every much a coming of age story for the 40ish Bash, as it is a black commentary on the military and our current state of affairs. Recognizeable faces like Corey Feldman, The Iron Shiek and Daniel Baldwin make this fun on another level as well, and the former particularly nails his role as a comedian who's the only one to dig his jokes. Mark Metcalf is also notable as the scene stealing military chief who supervises Bash's mission. Also Noel Britton who is refreshingly charming on screen as Bash's long time friend. You'll love the most awkward production of not quite Les Miserables, the touching moments (largely from Britton), and the journey Bash and his misfits go on (which may or may not involve camels).

sportsbros808 On the war on global terrorism America's most effective weapon, of course, is a C-level rockabilly singer who is a combination of Elvis Presley and Johnny Cash. I know what you're thinking, "ANOTHER one of these movies?"Zero Dark Dirty is a comedy in the tradition of the "Naked Gun" and "Scary Movie" franchises. It pokes fun at current popular films while framing it in a somewhat absurd storyline. If you are fans of these types of films Zero Dark Dirty is right down your alley.The main character, Belvis Bash (played admirably by Lex Lvovsky) is a down on his luck musician. When the movie opens he is performing in a nursing home. He gets the opportunity to be a part of the government's Pop Culture Outreach Program and perform for the people of Afghanistan. He agrees and, as they say, hijinx ensue.I don't want to give too much away but this is a "fish out of water" story with Belvis trying to understand the local culture. There is even the obligatory love interest in the form of May Summer, played by Noel Britton. She got roped into participating by answering an ad for a musical entitled "Les Miserables: Episode One." There are a lot of these types of jokes throughout the movie. Oh, and did I mention there are cameos by Frank Stallone and Daniel Baldwin? This movie has everything.The film pokes good-natured fun at Middle Eastern culture as well as American "decadence." No doubt, the usual group of people who get offended by this type of humor will be offended. However, there is nothing mean-spirited about the humor in this film. While some jokes are a bit cringe-worthy it is all done in good fun.If you are looking for a good laugh and like pop culture references I strongly suggest you take a look at this film.

TaVork Zero Dark Dirty is the kind of film that's like biting into a soft-caramel filled chocolate when you were expecting simply chocolate (provided you like caramel, if you don't insert whatever candy-filling is your favorite). It has the feel of a classic Hope & Crosby "Road to..." movie, but several strange, unexpected elements turn it into a unique viewing experience. It's romantic comedy and political satire, action/adventure and rock & roll musical. You wouldn't think any of these would mesh, but they manage to create a lighthearted and, at times, intensely powerful feature. Lex Lvovsky and Noel Britton nail their starring performances among a star-studded, eclectic cast with such faces as Corey Feldman, The Iron Sheik, Mark Metcalf, Frank Stallone, Daniel Baldwin, and Larry Thomas (the Soup Nazi in an emotionally impacting scene). If you like your Johnny Cash laced with a little Elvis and good-old-fashioned American pride, Zero Dark Dirty is the film for you!