Dorathen Better Late Then Never

Derrick Gibbons An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

Fleur Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

Scarlet The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

Michael Ledo The title should say, "Don't expect much." I expected a bad script, bad acting, bad science, and bad special effects. In that regard I wasn't disappointed. If you decide to turn it off after a giant shark jumps out of the water and takes a jet out of the sky, wait. We later find out they can travel 500 knots, but have trouble catching a nuclear sub doing less than say, 40 knots. No wait. These nuclear subs have something called "emergency turbos" so maybe they can go faster. Sailors on nuclear subs don't carry handguns. Really. Who would they shoot underwater? At one point they flash the locations of the recent attacks. Nearly all were in the Pacific ocean as expected. There were 3 in the Atlantic. As Sarah Palin might tweet, "WTF?" These creatures for some unexplained reason are impervious to conventional weapons so the military led by our secret government kidnaps three scientists to employ them for information on how to kill them. They get right on the task by mixing water tainted with various vegetable dies. We discover red water added to blue water makes purple water and that blonds love Japanese men who try to act like Sulu as much as Orientals love blonds. After a romp in a closet, they figure out they can lure the creatures into certain ports (San Francisco and Tokoyo) which have a natural shelf and then trap them. The idea being they can get in, but somehow they can't get out, unless they catch a ride with a plane flying overhead. They then manufacture a phermone of an extinct animal for which they would normally have no idea where to start. We know they are successful because when they mix two liquids together it turns florescent green and Debbie Gibson smiles.At one point Japanese and American subs are in the same area. All the American subs are destroyed but one. The Japanese civilian scientist asks, which one is it, as Debbie or now Deborah Gibson is on one of them. The captain says, "No way of telling." After making subs (this film and Moby Dick) do all kinds of things beyond any smidgeon of realism, they claim they "can't tell." Really they can tell. Each sub has its own unique underwater signature.The creatures look very artificial. But what did you expect? If you enjoy getting stoned and watching "Lost in Space" episodes, give this one 5 stars.Movie drops f-bomb once, no nudity, no sex scenes.

GL84 After being released from the Arctic, a biologist joins with a military operation trying to track down and destroy an escaped Megalodon and a giant octopus who've rejoined an ancient feud that's destroying the world.While this one was a slight disappointment, there's still a lot of enjoyable elements to this one. What really works in this one is the film's briefer attacks here, as there's plenty of fun, exciting sequences that are fun, short and immensely cheesy and manage to include both creatures getting ample screen-time to accomplish this. The octopus here manages to get a great attack on an oil rig ripping it to pieces and getting a fine ambush on a fighter jet, while the shark gets the highlight as it takes out a jet up in the sky and a spectacular battle in San Francisco Bay where the military battle leads nicely into the destruction of the Golden Gate Bridge. The shark manages to hold on with several other great scenes here with the submarine chase out in the high seas which is incredibly thrilling due to the high-speed-chase nature of the scenes and the close encounters of the attacks against the subs, and a huge lead-in to the sea-caverns escape gives this a lot to like overall. Even the titular battles comes off great, as there's a few opening rounds before getting to an extended, drawn-out battle that's incredibly fun and exciting as the battle switches up the aggressor and who's in charge of the fight in a spectacularly cheesy scene that nice nicely follows the type of cheese featured in the rest of the film. As well as the cheesy fun, there's more fun in the opening release of the creatures in the midst of the traveling whale pod that makes this one come off really well and gives it a lot of enjoyable times here. These here are enough to make this one enjoyable even though there's a few problems in here. The biggest issues in this one is the absolutely ridiculous CGI here, which is a lot more prevalent here than in most others out there. There's the usual feature of keeping the creatures looking obvious and unrealistic by being completely low-tech versions that rarely interact with their surroundings all too well, but another issue strikes up here with the film prolonging the action by either repeating shots from elsewhere over and over again or keeping in a series of shots that don't really mesh together all too well. Scenes like the destroyer battle out in the open sea or their final battle together in are both highly appropriate forms of this one as they're both CGI heavy that are just woefully executed and aren't really good enough to be cheesy with the repetition of these flaws through along the scenes. The other big flaw here is the really troubling pace here that keeps the action stifled to a few isolated segments here as the film takes on several different plot lines that keep the shark action in favor of these lame story lines, from the contrived romance and the scenes of the group talking tough with the military that eats up so much time that it keeps the creature action out of this one. These here are the film's real flaws.Rated R: Graphic Language and Graphic Violence.

MechaWingZero The unfortunate thing about this movie is that it doesn't deliver on its selling point at all. I love ridiculous Z-grade entertainment, but this film didn't provide that.There is only roughly 15 minutes of the mega shark and/or the giant octopus that the title promises us. Instead, we get these very boring people talking on and on about these monsters. Just talk, talk, and more talk (and not interesting talk, this isn't Tarantino's Death Proof).I wanted to love this movie, I really went into it with a heavy bias in favor of it, but it really disappointed me. No it's not as bad as Snakes on a Train, but that is a really really low standard to compare it to. There are a few moments of this film that I really liked, such as the shark jumping out of the water and taking down an airplane, but these are very scarce compared to the boring dialog.

speedythecat07 This movie was a 5. I gave it a ridiculous 10 to offset someone's ridiculous 1.I can't imagine what sort of person watches a movie like this and gives it a "1" plus writes a review saying how bad it is. Were they expecting Shawshank? This movie is for a certain type of sci-fi nerd (such as myself) to pass a little time and have some fun in the process. I think if you are the B-movie sci-fi nerd type you realize this is far from the worst thing ever made and you will enjoy while others sling mud at it and criticize it like it was made to compete with Transformers or something. Truth is, I bet you take all the people out there that gave it a "1" and put a camera in their hand and give them some money and see what they could do, they would realize quickly what their skillset is.No doubt if you were drunk or high this would be much better and if you have a buddy or significant other to enjoy it with it would be even more enjoyable. I don't do either of the first 2 and my wife was at work when I watched this, but still I enjoyed it for what it was.It is for a certain demographic of folks to enjoy and no doubt a small demographic, but we are out there.My point is, it saddens me to think there are people out there who rare this a "1" because they think it was "crap". The truth is they just didn't have realistic expectations and or were stupid enough to really think this was supposed to be a theatrical masterpiece. Are there people this dumb?