TrueJoshNight Truly Dreadful Film

Solemplex To me, this movie is perfection.

Smartorhypo Highly Overrated But Still Good

Josephina Great story, amazing characters, superb action, enthralling cinematography. Yes, this is something I am glad I spent money on.

Michael Ledo Nude Raves, women in cages, and Kim Cattrall with a bad German accent sounding like Terri Garr in "Young Frankenstein. What was not to like? The acting was ham. The script was nonsense and dialogue humorous.Van Helsing: "You would being willing to drive a stake through someone's heart and you don't believe in vampires?" Gabriel Casseus: "I need this job."There is really no horror in this movie. It is a comedy, but not a laugh out loud type of comedy. It is a cult comedy and viewable even with Casper Van Dien.

Leofwine_draca REVENANT (originally titled MODERN VAMPIRES) is a low budget vampire comedy that was marketed as a straightforward vampire horror flick here in the UK. Either way it's a dog of a film, shot on what looks like no budget and in the dark, and made as a TV movie too. This spoofy yarn supposedly reveals the real life of the modern Hollywood vampire, which seems to involve hanging around in nightclubs and acting incredibly vapid and self-centred.A plethora of gore gags and lame make-up effects are thrown into the mix to try to make something stick, but the truth is that this is a lamentable film indeed. There's nothing worse than an unfunny comedy, and REVENANT is exactly that; I can honestly say I didn't laugh once. John Landis's INNOCENT BLOOD is a perfect example of the genre at its finest and this film doesn't even come close to the quality of that movie.Bizarrely, Rod Steiger makes an appearance as Van Helsing here, so you have to feel for him a little. But wooden actors like Casper Van Dien and Kim Cattrall both should know better. There's a mercifully brief cameo from Udo Kier, but for much of the running time we have to put up with the appalling grating accents of Craig Ferguson and his buddies. As I said, it's a dog of a film.

bkoganbing Other than Rod Steiger doing this tongue in cheek imitation of Laurence Olivier's Mitteleuropa accent and having a ball as a modern Dr. Van Helsing, this rather witless comedy might go over with the juvenile trade, but not too many others. It certainly does make vampires out to be such fun creatures.Natasha Gregson Wagner and Casper Van Dien are a couple of modern vampires who are tired of the rule of that most notorious vampire of them all, Count Dracula as played by Robert Pastorelli. But all of them have to worry that that famous vampire slaughterer Van Helsing who's on the prowl with some new kind of help, a few boys from the hood.Except when Steiger was on the screen I didn't get too many laughs out of this film though. Maybe it's because my taste in music just doesn't run to rap which blares at intervals during the movie. There is one other good scene I did like. Kim Catrall pulling a freight train with the Van Helsing helpers and turning them all into vampires. It's the inevitable result of sex with one.For the juvenile trade strictly.

mkiraly Only in America can vampires expect to call for garbage pickup. No messy disposal problems here. As a vampire author, I'd far rather see vampire movies that feature something new, rather than rehashing the old myths - no matter how well it's done. (For a similar new take on vampires, though hardly as funny, be sure to see Dance of the Damned) Actually, though Modern Vampires seems to strive to be intentionally bad, this makes it very funny, very hip though certainly not for everyone.I loved it for the early humor (The scene with the bitchy salesperson in the dress shop was worth the rental price all by itself), and was sad to see the over the top end did not work quite as well as the first half.